ED's weekend

Trigger warning ED thoughts and behaviors i do mention weight not actual weight but goal weight. 



Today's wednesday and i've maintained my weight i think since i told all of you last and like the title said it's ED's opportunity to get closer to my goal weight maybe even hit it! My brother literally have games all day on Saturday and my little brother has a game than my other brother has two games back to back so i plan to do alot of P90X, my 13 year old brother brother doesn't like to when i go ahead of him and my mom because we were all supposed to do it together but they've only done 1 dvd and i've done like 5 or 6. They're waay behind. If i do go ahead he threatens me with telling my mom so i haven't done it in about 5 days and we all need to get back on track, or at least I do!


Sunday i'm going to hangout with my boyfriend which will be nice we're stronger than ever and i love him! Friday night and Saturday is our usual hangout days but Saturday is the perfect day for me to relax when everyone's out of the house! Since they will be gone all day i plan to blog, workout (p90x), watch videos and to be honest i'm excited because there's no rules meaning i can drink as many diet dr. peppers as I want (I kind of do that anyway, oops!) workout loads and eat or not eat what i want. I'm not planning to eat all day but in reality i will have something. I'm at my lowest weight and have maintained for about a week or so.

I'm not going to say my goal weight on here it's not necessary but i'm only 4'11 so my goal weight is lower than others i think. Let's just say my goal weight is 6 pounds less than i am now or 7 actually. I have 2 goal weights and they're 4 pounds away from eachother lol :) When you're my height you can easily notice weightloss even if it's 4 pounds. I know when i'm hungry and i know when i'm full, i know when to give my body food even when it has little caloric value.

I'm not dumb and i know where my hunger hits it's breaking point meaning i need to give my body at least something of nutritional value and i give it what it needs in that respect, i hate the misconceptions that anorexics don't eat. We do stay alive but nothing "unsafe", nothing too dangerous that our standards don't allow. Basically i give my body the nutrition what it needs even i rarely eat a full meal. I give my body what it needs when it needs it like really you're going to pass out if you don't give me something kind of need but i get through the day and that's all that matters to me.

I've noticed i've gotten alot more views on my blog and also different countries which is awesome! For those of you that are new i realize i said 4'11 yes and i'm 16! just to clarify, i know i'm small but i like being small. :)