What is one thing that you have always wanted to do, but haven't?

I've held myself from a lot of things mostly because i didn't want my past to reveal itself again. I'm talking about school sports, I started practicing with the cross country team in August of this year because i thought i was ready to try something new and was mentally prepared for it as well. I took alot of prompting by my parents though. I actually enjoyed once i got the hang of it, the running part i mean :)

I'm more of an alone runner meaning like i can run by myself and run fine because ya know it's on my own pace, i can stop when i want and there's no time limit. The sad thing is though i really enjoy running (when it's not negative degrees outside :)) I've also always wanted to go skydiving :) i think that would be fun! I totally got off track! I apologize, so yeah and to be honest i was scared to join school sports again even when i really wanted to do it because of my past.

I'm just not good at running in front of people because when i run by myself i don't really push myself like at the practices i was going to. I didn't end up joining the team because i was self-conscious about running in front of experienced runners and i felt like they were secretly judging me even though they were very welcoming and cheered me on a lot because this was my first time joining the team.

My whole point is to get out there and find your voice and keep trying to find something you really love. Last year i actually joined a theater group outside of school because i could never perform in front of people i see every day! I've joined a poetry contest recently and to be honest it's perfectly okay to be not athletic or sporty because i quit competitive cheer leading i thought that i lost my definition of an athlete because 6 days a week for 3 1/2 years my home away from home was the gym. Apart from the people i did have a passion for the the sport and still do.

Honestly though I've had more opportunities when i'm not classified as an athlete as when i was strong physically but mentally the girls on my team were tearing me apart.